The Christmas party was going smoothly until the sociopathic interns' Ayahuasca Cookies kicked in. Emily Kane had two before she started speaking.
In the Military you're a name on a list that's tacked up on a wall. The list tells you to move to South Carolina to work your ass off in a city that has the worst drinking water quality in the nation. Yum... Today you're my Army and I'm going to divide you up and send you off to yummy places and you're going to like it. Four Teams. Four Missions.
Team A - Keep making the digital cameras.
Team B. We've got an arc of projects ahead of us. You're going to apply your Pompotous advertising knowledge to produce the Fuck out of our products and our brand. We're going to call our cameras, Kameras from now on. Harder K like an Asian would say it. All our products are going to get corny Asian themy names from now on. Everybody loves Asian Corn. Your goal is to make this company The Domino. Which domino is The Domino? Which else? The moving one! Boom-boom-boom... Produce our Products.... Boom-boom-boom. Make us a Top Shelf Brand that everybody knows is worth it. Make us The Domino!
Team C. You're going to build miniature digital music players and tiny phones and handheld computers. We're going to expand our product line for several years but then things are going to converge on an everything device - An E-thing. ETs do more than phone home. When I say everything I mean everything. Your phone is a camera, a translator, a chess grandmaster, an AED, a color R2-D2 3D projector with Bose sound that is able to project a three dimensional Hypnotic Sensei Doctor capable of giving lifesaving tutelage (using the AED feature where required), a grief councillor, a Taser, a laser pointer, a thermostat... We'll have to make a Swiss Army Version... It will be cherry Red, metal ribbed but able to get on an airplane... Got it yet? Chop Chop.
Team D. It's 2001... Space is Calling... You're going to be our Sun Gods. Deep Space Skunkworks R&D division. The ideas you build here are going to change the world. We're going to use our printing technology to lower the cost of solar manufacturing. We're going to change how solar panels are made. Think large solar sheets held vertically to the ground and stationary - the process tools will move around either side simultaneously. We'll print the same sort of computer chips that our digital Kameras have onto our solar wafer wall - the designs won't process images - our Sun Chips will handle each cell's network communications, power conditioning, fire and grid protection, maintenance and so on. The goal is to have an everything version of the Sun Chip that costs less than a penny per watt. When we unstealth we're going to rebrand as Clear Power with a tag line of Boldly Going.
See how the engine works? Spark. BAM! Expansion... Power Stroke... Convergence. Spark BAM! Repeat. See the Cycles? Each supplies the Existence Theorem for the next. We did this so we can do that. Why is everyone dancing? Who invited Donkey Kong?